


Lovers Will

by rsadelle



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-28
Updated: 2007-12-28
Packaged: 2017-10-28 12:14:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/307771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rsadelle/pseuds/rsadelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For some reason, Angel shows up and is hassling Spike. All of a sudden, Xander's between them, looking almost as surprised to be there as Angel is to see him there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lovers Will

**Author's Note:**

> This one was verging on epic. You can also see my thought process where I was reworking the ideas and my end of a conversation with a friend about it. This has not one but two complete sex scenes.

For some reason, Angel shows up and is hassling Spike. All of a sudden, Xander's between them, looking almost as surprised to be there as Angel is to see him there.

"Lay off, Deadboy," he says, and then, at the look on Angel's face, he cracks lamely, "Passions was pre-empted all week. Spike hasn't gotten over it yet."

"Get out of the way," Angel growls at him. "I'm his Sire."

"You're his GrandSire," Xander points out. "You're supposed to bring him candy in your pockets and tell stories, not try to boss him around."

And then somehow it moves to Xander suggesting Spike could get a job--"You could bounce at Willy's or something. You could get paid for beating up demons." And Spike takes him up on it, because not only does he get paid--which means that he and Xander can afford to move out of Xander's parents' basement and into their own basement apartment somewhere else--but he can also get free blood on the job.

Then Xander has a shitty day and shows up at Willy's because he wants to drink but he needs someone to be able to take him home if he gets drunk, so Spike gets Willy to take the door and goes to serve drinks so he can keep a closer eye on Xander. Which he thinks is a good idea because some demon hits on Xander, so Spike gets to lean over the bar and tell the guy that Xander's with him. And then Xander tells him that he speaks the demon's language and he could have said no on his own.

"Hey, Spike." He says on a grin. "Gonna let me in?"

Spike snorts. "To Willy's? Not bloody likely."

"Come on, Spike," Xander wheedles. "Let me in."

"This is a demon joint, case you hadn't noticed."

"I want to get drunk," Xander says, direct and straight into Spike's eyes. "I can't do that if I have to walk home alone."

That seems reasonable enough to Spike. "Wait here," he says, and disappears through the door into the bar proper. He comes back not that much later with Willy at his side.

"Come on, then." They leave Willy at the door and head for the bar. Spike ducks behind the bar and growls at someone who frees up a barstool for Xander.

"What do you want then?"

Xander shrugs. "Doesn't matter." He flashes a grin at Spike. "This is your chance to have me drink any alcohol you want." He holds up a finger to stall what he's sure Spike will say. "No blood or other icky demon things."

Spike grins at him. "Right." And he starts serving drinks.

Xander drinks what Spike puts in front of him, one after the other. Things he recognizes. Things he doesn't. Things he knows are better than anything he could ever afford. One drink that makes him choke and screw up his face. Spike laughs at him and replaces it with something else, something better.

There's a demon, a big guy, who takes the barstool next to Xander and growls at him in his own language. Before Xander can do anything, Spike's there, in front of the demon, growling back. Xander blinks at them and sips his drink. The demon growls at Spike and then turns to Xander.

"Can I buy you a drink?" he asks, in English.

Xander shakes his head before Spike can say anything. "Like the vamp said, I'm with him." He downs the last of the drink in his hand and drops the glass on the bar, looking to Spike expectantly.

Spike automatically gets him a new drink. "You knew what I said?" he asks, nodding at the retreating demon.

Xander shrugs. "His type's pretty common around here." He's pleasantly drunk now, and it's nice. He's had a shitty day, but it's almost reassuring. No one trying to kill him or end the world, just your average, everyday crap day. Late to work, boss yelling at him, customers sniping at him all day, nothing in the fridge for dinner, Scoobies off patrolling without him by the time he'd been ready to go out. But by some miracle he has tomorrow off, which means he can sleep off his hangover in peace.

It's still an hour or two to closing when he's ready to go, and Spike sees it.

"You gonna be alright here for a minute?" Spike asks him, leaning almost too close over the bar.

"Yeah, sure." There's a little liquid left in his glass, and he drinks that while Spike disappears across the room.

He comes back with Willy in tow. Willy takes over the bartending duties and Spike says to Xander, "Right, then, mate, let's go."

Xander stands and finds that maybe that's not really a good idea. Spike catches him before he falls. "Easy there, mate."

It's amazingly easy to get out of there. He's with a Master Vampire, and no one hassles them even though he's a measly human who's not only drunk but didn't pay for anything all evening.

Spike has to half walk, half carry him home to their new basement. Spike props him up against the wall and unlocks the door before propelling him in. Xander's inclined to fall right into his bed, but Spike makes him brush his teeth and drink what seems like a gallon of water first. There's aspirin too, which he swallows dry and straight from Spike's hand. After all that, Spike lets him strip down to his boxers and crawl into bed.

Of course, life being what it is, once he's there he can't fall asleep.

"Unfair," he mutters. "Spiiike. I can't sleeeep." He's drunk and he's whining, and all he wants to do is sleep.

"All right, whelp." Spike sounds amused, and there's the sound of his boots hitting the floor and then water running, which confuses Xander. He's grateful for it, though, when Spike's hands settle onto his shoulders and they're warm.

He's already relaxed, but Spike's hands digging into the places that are usually tense turn him into a little puddle of melted Xander.

"'S really good," he manages to say, or thinks he does. Maybe Spike says something back, and maybe he doesn't. Either way, it doesn't take much before Xander's deep in sleeping it off dreamland.

Some time later, Angel comes to visit them.

"Aren't you going to invite me in?"

"No," and the boy has the nerve to step outside and half-close the door behind him.

Spike comes out to see what's going on, eating blood and Weetabix out of a mug with a spoon. He cocks his head at Xander. "We not lettin' him in, then?"

"No." Xander shifts to put himself just a little more between Angel and Spike.

"Fair enough." And to Angel, "What d'you want?"

"I'd like to speak to my childe," Angel says, and there's a touch of steel behind it.

Xander doesn't back down. "Spike," he says, without turning to look at him, "do you want to talk to him?"

Spike has to swallow down a mouthful of blood and cereal. "Not particularly."

Xander nods, and looks at him. "Right." He pushes Spike back into the basement. "Always a pleasure, Deadboy." And he steps in and closes the door behind them.

"Think he'll go away?" Spike asks.

Xander shrugs. "He'll burn if he doesn't leave before dawn."

Spike smirks. "We can only hope."

"He doesn't want to talk to you."

"You didn't know that the first time I was here."

Xander just keeps looking at him. "Yes, I did."

Angel crosses his arms over his chest and glares at Xander. Xander looks back at him and then over at Spike. Spike tilts his head up in half a question.

"The basement's not that big, and you talk in your sleep," Xander says, to Spike.

And then later Spike and Xander get together.

Also, today I was thinking about Xander having someone else draw blood from him and bottling it for Spike. Maybe as a death day present. Do we know the date that Dru turned him?

My other idea was for Xander not to tell him he'd done it (er, not as a special occasion present, just a for-my-roommate present) and just hand him a warmed up cup of blood when he wakes up one evening. And Spike realizes it's human, but he takes it and drinks without asking and then stops to look at it and really smell it.

"This is your blood."

"Yeah," Xander says. "Don't drink it too fast. I can't donate again for eight weeks."

Spike sips it slowly, savoring it. "Thanks, mate," he says.

Xander shrugs like it's no big deal. "Sure."

And, really, it's not that Xander smells like food. It's that the food smells like Xander. And Spike likes food. And he likes Xander. And it's all good with him. Besides, he doesn't get that much, so he sort of rations it out, trying to make it last. Because this is good stuff, really good. It hasn't been processed or mixed with anything or whatever it is the blood places do to make even the best human blood taste just a little stale. Or maybe it's just that while he's drinking, the donor is right there with him. Not quite the same as drinking straight from the vein, but better than what he's been getting.

Spike and Xander, under a lot of pressure from Buffy and Willow, host a Scooby get-together in their basement. Giles brings take-out and Buffy brings the wine. Willow and Tara bring desert and charms. They even have one for Spike. Xander has just enough wine glasses, and he pours it out for everyone. He swirls a little of his own blood out of the bottle still in the fridge and into Spike's glass. It gets him a surprised look and a pleased nod.

He wakes up with Spike in his bed, wrapped around him. He doesn't really mind; it's hot out, and they can't afford to run the air conditioning at night. Except Spike's not letting him go. And he wouldn't really mind that either, except.

"I have to go to work," he says. He can tell Spike's not sleeping.

"Spiiiike." He draws it out into a whine, and the twitch of Spike's lips lets him know the effort is appreciated. It's not enough to get Spike to let go.

He leans in close so he can whisper in Spike's ear. "If they fire me, we won't get the employee discount on Weetabix anymore." There's stillness for a moment while Spike thinks about that, and then he lets go.

Xander wakes up too early. He's burning up, and with Spike in his bed--again--it's probably not just the weather. He squirms his way out of Spike's grip and nearly falls down when he gets out of bed. He makes it to the bathroom and the cold water he splashes on his face is such a relief he takes a washcloth with him.

He calls in to leave a message for his boss. There's no way he's going to work when he feels this bad.

He's flopped on the couch, half asleep, cartoons on the TV, when Spike comes out to peer down at him.

"Don't you have to work?"

Xander forces his eyes open. "'M sick."

Spike reaches down to put a hand on his forehead. "Bloody hell, pet, you're burning up."

Xander just closes his eyes and relaxes into the couch cushions. He hears Spike punch numbers into the phone and talk to someone, but it's not him so he doesn't have to pay attention. Then Spike lifts up his head and when he gets to lie down again, his head is in Spike's lap and Spike's hands are stroking over his face and through his hair. They're cool, and it's nice.

The door opens later, and that's weird because he's here and Spike's here, so who would be opening the door?

"Xander?" Willow's voice, and the hand on his forehead now is too warm.

He opens his eyes and Willow's crouched down next to him. "Hey, Wills," he croaks.

"Hey." She holds out a thermometer. "Gotta take your temp." She sticks the thing into his mouth and waits with him while Spike slides out from under him.

"You want me to cook?" Spike asks, sounding like he's in the kitchen. When Xander concentrates, he can hear the sound of bags rustling and the fridge opening and closing, like maybe Willow's brought them groceries.

"If you can microwave blood, you can microwave chicken soup," Willow says, and a minute later she takes the thermometer out of Xander's mouth. "He has a fever," she tells Spike, frowning at Xander in a worried way.

She goes away to wherever Spike is, and Xander concentrates on what she's saying.

"Take his temp every couple of hours. If it goes above 102, call me or Buffy or Giles. He needs fluids. I brought juice and ginger ale and 7-Up, and there's chicken soup. Just follow the directions to heat it up. Try to get him to eat some of it and drink something. A lot of something. He needs fluids."

"You said that already," Spike says. He sounds almost amused, and he's coming back toward Xander, so he opens his eyes and looks up. "Here, pet, drink some of this."

Xander obligingly wraps his lips around the straw and drinks. Ginger ale, and that's just what Willow used to bring him when he was sick when he was a kid.

"Here," Willow says. "I bought Tylenol, too."

Spike takes the straw away and tries to give him something else. "Come on, Xander, take the Tylenol."

Xander swallows the Tylenol from Spike's hand, and Spike holds the glass up for him to have more ginger ale. He's suddenly thirsty, and he drains the glass. Spike moves away, taking the empty glass with him, and Willow crouches down next to him.

"I have to go to class," she says. She strokes his hair back from his forehead. "Spike's going to take care of you." She sounds doubtful about that. "If he doesn't, call me and I'll come back and take care of you. Okay?"

"Yeah, Wills," he says. "Okay."

She bends down to kiss his forehead. "Be good for Spike." She makes a face. "Or, you know, whatever."

"I know." He dredges up a smile for her. "Thanks, Wills."

She kisses his forehead again. "Get some rest." She says something else to Spike, but Xander's almost asleep again and doesn't catch what it is.

He wakes up later, and nearly falls off the couch when he tries to stand up.

Spike's there to help him. "Easy, mate."

Once he's up, Xander can stand more or less steadily and Spike lets him walk to the bathroom on his own. He goes back to the couch when he's done, and Spike brings him something to drink. Orange juice this time, and it's fantastically good on his throat.

"Are you hungry?" Spike asks.

Xander takes a moment to think about that. "No," he decides. "Can I watch more cartoons?"

"Yes." Spike gives him the remote. He goes to the kitchen and comes back with a freshly filled glass of juice. He puts the glass down on the floor where Xander can reach it.

"Scoot over," Spike orders. Xander shuffles a little bit, but doesn't really go anywhere. Spike manages to squeeze in between him and the back of the couch anyway. Spike's coolness soaks up enough of his heat that he starts to feel better after only one episode of, well, something. He's not really paying attention, just sipping his juice and zoning out.

After a couple more episodes, his stomach starts to growl, and Spike worms his way off the couch. The microwave beeps a couple of times, and Spike comes back with two mugs and a box of crackers.

"Sit up, mate. Here's lunch." Spike helps Xander sit up and gives him the mug with chicken soup in it.

He feels better after lunch, especially when Spike gets him a glass of 7-Up.

"Have to take your temp," Spike says, waving the thermometer at him. "Don't want Red to be mad at me." He sticks the thermometer in Xander's mouth and watches the clock. "Still high," he says. "Can't give you any more Tylenol for another couple of hours."

Xander shrugs. "It's all right." He lies down again and changes the channel, looking for something else to sleep through. "Hey," he protests, when Spike takes the remote out of his hand.

"Passions is on." Spike gives him an obviously faked pleading look, and he can't help laughing. It doesn't matter, really. He's going back to sleep anyway, so let Spike watch his soap.

He wakes up a couple of hours later, and this time Spike gives him more Tylenol and they're back to ginger ale.

"You're a good roommate," he says, and then blinks at Spike. "Why are you being such a good roommate?"

"Can't afford the place by myself, can I?" Spike pushes him back against the couch.

Xander pouts up at him. "I'm not sleepy." Spike sighs heavily, but hands him the remote. Xander beams up at him and finds something to watch. Spike complains about his choice and brings him drinks all afternoon.

Willow comes by before sundown.

"How are you feeling?" she asks him.

Xander half shrugs. "Sick. Not sleepy, though." He smiles up at her. "Spike's been taking care of me."

"Yeah," she says. "I can tell he's being all Mr. Nice Roommate."

"Mr. Nice Roommate," Spike says, "has to go to work tonight. All right if I leave the boy alone?"

Willow frowns at him. "When do you have to go?"

"Soon's it gets dark. I get off at midnight. Be back not long after."

Willow nods. "I'll stay, take care of Xander."

"Wills," Xander protests, "you don't have to do that. I can take care of myself for a couple of hours."

"I don't mind taking care of you, Xander. Besides," she holds up her backpack, "homework."

"Oh," he says. "Okay."

Willow makes dinner--more soup--for them while Spike gets ready for work, and she even heats up a cup of blood for Spike to drink before he leaves.

"Be good for Red," Spike tells him, and he could swear Spike's laughing at him, even though his face is serious.

"Go earn your keep," Xander says, rallying despite how silly he must look in his boxers at the kitchen table with a bowl of soup and a glass of orange juice. And crackers. Can't forget the crackers.

Spike smirks at him. "Right."

Willow doesn't get much homework done after dinner because she joins him on the couch for a little TV watching.

He goes to bed not very much later. Willow makes him take more Tylenol before she lets him, but that's okay because it's nice to have her taking care of him.

He wakes up again to Willow's voice, closer than the living room couch, saying, "...restless, but I think his fever's down."

There's a cool hand on his forehead, and Spike says, "Yeah, he feels cooler."

"Spike?" Xander forces his eyes open and peers up at Spike, leaning over him.

"Yeah, whelp. 'M back." His hand is still on Xander's forehead. "Good night for tips."

Xander smiles sleepily up at him. "Good. Did you bring me some of that good bar ice?"

Spike shakes his head and returns his smile. "No, but if you ask nicely I might bring you a glass of water."

Xander does his best to flutter his eyelashes and not smirk when it makes Willow giggle. "Please, Mr. Bartender, may I have a glass of water?"

Spike laughs at him, and ruffles his hair, and goes to get him a glass of water. "You need me to walk you home?" he asks Willow when he comes back.

"No. I'll just call Buffy. She'll come get me."

Spike takes the drained glass from Xander. "Right. I'm gonna grab a shower." He disappears, and Willow goes to the living room for the phone.

It's still too hot, and he's glad when Spike gets out of the shower.

"Shove over," Spike says.

"Can't. Willow's homework." Xander gestures at the books spread out over half the bed.

Spike reaches over him and gathers Willow's homework into a neat stack. "Shove over," he says again, and this time Xander can scoot over to make enough room for Spike.

Xander turns a little and rests his forehead against Spike's thigh. It's cool, and then there's real cold against his temples as Spike drapes a wet washcloth over his head.

"Buffy's going to--" Willow stops for a minute when she comes in the room. "To, to come over and walk me home."

Xander pokes his head out from under the washcloth to watch her shove her books into her bag. "Thanks for taking care of me."

"You're welcome." Willow grins at him and bends down to kiss his forehead. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Mmmhmm." Xander's sleepy and Spike's stroking a hand through his hair and down his back. He doesn't wait to hear Willow leave before he falls asleep.

He wakes up early and starving the next morning. His need to be clean outstrips his hunger, and he chooses the bathroom over the kitchen for his first stop.

A shower leaves him feeling human again and he heads for the kitchen to scrounge up breakfast. He eats the first pop tart cold while the other one toasts. He eats the second one while he cracks eggs into a pan.

"Feeling better, then?" Spike asks.

"Mmhmm." Xander eyes the eggs and drops two pieces of bread into the toaster.

Spike takes a packet of blood out of the fridge. "Goin' to work?"

Xander shakes his head. "Day off." He doesn't bother to butter the toast before he shoves half of one piece in his mouth.

Spike sips at his newly warmed mug of blood. "Lucky you."

"Yeah." He pauses to put jam on the second piece of toast and dishes up the eggs.

"Goin' to eat yourself out of house and home," Spike observes.

"'M hungry," Xander says through a mouth of scrambled eggs. He swallows. "Being sick takes a lot of energy."

Spike shakes his head like Xander's just not something he can understand.

The phone rings just as Xander shoves the last bite of eggs into his mouth.

"Xander's house of wellness," he says, and he's rewarded with Willow's giggle.

"You're feeling better!" she says brightly.

"That I am. You and Spike can start up your own nursing program. I'll be your spokesperson."

"I think you need some actual training for a whole nursing program."

"Maybe just a home comfort program," Xander suggests.

Willow laughs. "Lunch?" she asks.

"Yes," Xander says, "lunch is the meal between breakfast and dinner."

Willow laughs at him again. "Would you like to have lunch with me?" she clarifies.

"Yes," he agrees. They make plans while Spike steps out onto the balcony to smoke.

"Are you lonely?" Willow asks him halfway through lunch. It makes him put his sandwich down and focus on their conversation.

"Hey, no," he says. "I've got you and Buffy and the Dawnster. And Giles, even if he's kind of old. And English."

Willow smiles before she remembers she's supposed to be serious. "I meant without Anya. Isn't your place lonely?" She looks anxious and worried.

He shrugs lightly. "Spike's there."

And there's Willow's resolve face. Belatedly it occurs to Xander where this might be going.

"Yeah," she says, "Spike is there." She stares him down. "He took good care of you while you were sick." She gives him a worried look. "You were cuddled up to him." It's not an accusation.

"He's cool," Xander says, "in a temperature kind of way." It's true in other ways, but that's not relevant to this conversation. Or maybe it is, but he doesn't want to say it. Not yet anyway.

Willow picks at her lunch. "Does he keep you cool a lot?" she finally asks.

"Our schedules don't usually overlap," Xander says carefully. He tries not to think about the way the boundaries have blurred.

Willow frowns at him. "I just don't want you to be unhappy."

She looks so genuinely distressed that he smiles and squeezes her hand.

"I'm not," he says. "Really."

***

Angel starts calling. At first, Xander's polite and Spike says, "Sod off," before he hangs up. After a dozen calls, Spike starts hanging up as soon as he hears Angel's voice. A couple dozen more, and so does Xander.

Angel starts calling more and more often. During the day, when Xander's at work and Spike's trying to sleep, he leaves messages on the answering machine.

Spike stops answering the phone.

"I don't think Spike's sleeping much anymore," Xander frets to Willow.

He wakes up when the phone rings in the middle of the night, and Spike is already awake, tense and still in the bed next to him.

Xander rolls toward Spike. "Don't bother."

"He'll leave a message." Even Spike's voice is tight enough to snap.

Xander throws an arm over Spike. "Let him. I'll delete it in the morning." He cuddles--there's really no other word for it--Spike close and goes back to sleep.

He's dismayed to find Spike still awake when his alarm goes off. Dismayed, that's a good word. Willow would approve. He almost strokes Spike's forehead.

"Get some sleep, blondie," he says instead.

Sometime after lunch, the solution comes to him, and he nearly slaps his forehead at his own stupidity. He's in a meeting, though, so he decides that's not the best course of action.

Spike's lying awake in bed--still? again?--when Xander gets home.

"Goin' to work?" Xander asks on his way to the shower.

"Called in depressed." He doesn't even move his gaze from the ceiling.

Xander showers quickly and makes dinner for both of them. He takes it into the bedroom and sits cross-legged on the bed with his macaroni and cheese. He coaxes Spike into sitting up and drinking his blood. He usually doesn't let Spike eat in bed, and this should be accompanied by smart remarks and raised eyebrows.

The fact that it's not worries Xander.

"Get dressed," he says when Spike's finished his blood.

Spike lies back down and throws an arm over his eyes. "No."

It's almost funny--Spike acting like a stubborn fourteen-year-old--except that Xander knows just how much Angel's constant calls are wearing him out.

Xander nudges him with a foot. "Come on," he says. "I've got an idea."

Spike heaves a sigh and gets dressed.

He perks up a little once they're out of the apartment. "The mall?" he sneers when he sees where Xander's going. "Your idea is to go shopping?"

"Yeah," and now Xander's excited. He takes Spike into the mall and down the center of it until they find one of those little kiosks where they sell cell phones and cell phone accessories.

"Ta-da!" he says, and he even does the arm waving thing.

Spike eyes him suspiciously. "Joining the mobile age are you?"

"Nope," Xander says. "We are." He doesn't wait for Spike's reaction but turns immediately to flash a smile at the sales guy.

"Hi," he says. "We need two phones and some sort of plan."

"You can't afford that," Spike says, but Xander can see some of the hope and relief dawning in his eyes.

"No, I can't," Xander says cheerfully, "but we can. I know Willy pays you well enough."

Spike's positively gleeful by the time they get all the details worked out and the contract signed. He immediately learns how to program in phone numbers and puts Angel's in under "Sodding Wanker."

They take their new phones to the Scooby meeting, where Willow is appropriately appreciative of their new toys. Xander tells everyone his new phone number, warns them he won't be listening to the messages on the old number, and asks them not to give it out to anyone who might give it to Angel.

Spike keeps his number to himself. It's already programmed into Xander's phone, he points out, and they can go through him if they need Spike.

When they get home after patrol, Xander turns off the ringer on the phone and mutes the answering machine.

Spike sleeps deep and relaxed that night.

***

They go to a Scooby meeting a couple of weeks after they get the new phones and Angel's there, pacing.

"Spike." He moves too fast for anyone to follow and shoves Spike against a bookshelf. "You haven't been returning my calls, boy."

Spike tries to twist out of his grip. "Didn' want to talk to you."

"Well I want to talk to you."

"And I want you to leave him alone," Xander says. He's standing behind Angel with a stake. "Let him go."

Angel swipes at the stake, but Xander steps back out of reach and Angel chooses to keep his hold on Spike instead of following.

"Hey!" Willow objects. "You leave him alone."

Giles takes off his glasses and rubs his hand over his eyes. "Yes," he says. "Please do stop disrupting my shop."

"Or at least tell us what this is all about before you do whatever it is you're going to do to Spike," Buffy says, and she's mad.

"This," Angel growls, "is about taking back what's mine."

There's a delighted clap from above them, and, "Oh, yes." Drusilla herself is coming down the stairs, and how did she get up there anyway? "Angel's being a good daddy." She comes to Angel's side and rests her chin on his shoulder. "We're going to be a family again," she says to Spike, and reaches out to touch him.

Spike flinches from her.

"Are you insane?" Buffy asks, as if it weren't obvious.

Dru ignores Buffy. "Spike," she says, and it draws out forever, "don't you want to be part of our family?"

"Family?" Spike spits out. "You decided you didn't want me anymore. You chose a mucous dripping chaos demon over me. And Peaches here, he's none too keen on me either."

"But Spike," Dru strokes her palm down Spike's cheek.

"I don't think so." Buffy yanks her away and slams her up against the bookcase next to Spike, stake to her heart. "Why don't you just tell me what you did to Angel and maybe I'll let you get a head start."

"Daddy," Dru whines. "The girl's tryin' t' hurt me."

Angel glances over at them, and Spike takes advantage of his distraction to break free of his grip.

"Angel?" Buffy asks.

Angel stops and just stands there like an idiot.

"Has everybody gone crazy around here?" Xander asks.

Spike takes the stake from him and twirls it a little. "Beginnin' to think so."

"'S just a little spell," Dru croons, ignoring the stake against her chest. "Just a little one," she singsongs. "To make him want us again. To make us a family again."

Now it's Spike's turn to rub at his eyes. "Pet," he says gently, "we're not a family anymore. Haven't been for a long time. Don't think we're going to be again."

"No, Spike," she moans. "Don't say such things. We can have our good Daddy back. We can be a family again."

"No, Dru," he says firmly, and Xander wonders, knowing them, if this is the first time Spike has ever said that to her and really meant it. "We can't."

Dru drops something Xander hadn't even noticed her holding. When it shatters on the floor, Angel shudders and seems to wake up.

"Dru," he snaps sharply. "You can't keep putting spells on people to get your way."

"You used to like it when I put spells on people," she pouts. She's close to tears.

Angel gently pushes Buffy away from Dru. "But not anymore." He strokes Dru's cheek with what looks like real affection. "I'm sorry, Dru."

Dru turns away from him and throws a pleading look at Spike.

"No, Princess," he says.

She does cry then, with a wail that makes Willow and Xander jump.

Angel steps back and lets her go. She turns away from them and floats her way out into the night.

The tension drops about twenty levels once she's gone. Angel's shoulders slump and he comes toward Spike, who steps back, half behind Xander.

Angel stops. "Spike," he says, "I'm sorry."

"Yeah," Spike says, "I'll bet you are."

There's real regret on Angel's face, but Spike turns away from him and paces into the back instead.

Xander just shrugs at Angel.

Angel gives up on them and turns to Buffy. "Buffy," he says, "I'm sorry. It was a spell. You know what Dru's like."

She nods tightly. "I know."

They do that standing too close thing for a minute--"Do you want to stay? We can find room for you somewhere." "No, I'd better get back to LA."--and when Angel leaves everyone finally relaxes.

For something that's had Spike tied up in knots for weeks, and Xander pretty unhappy for the same period of time, it's over rather quickly. Usually there's more fighting or torture or crying and screaming or something.

Xander gauges Spike's mood and suggests they go patrolling.

He plays bait for a while, and toying with vamps too stupid to know better seems to improve Spike's mood.

When they get home, Xander sucks down a glass of juice and one of chocolate milk while he lets Spike take the first shower. Vampires don't sweat, but they can get dusty in a non-fatal way when killing other vampires. Plus Spike's more tired than he is, and he doesn't want to leave him alone with the temptation to get dust all over their nice clean sheets.

Their, yeah, and maybe its time to start thinking about those blurred boundaries. Or at least acknowledge that there aren't many boundaries left.

Another plus: the bathroom's nice and steamy when it's his turn. Spike likes the heat.

Xander didn't exert himself that much--just some running and a couple of vamps while Spike was otherwise occupied--so it's a quick shower for him, and then boxers and his comfortable bed. With their nice clean sheets.

Spike, always graceful, never awkward Spike fumbles in the dark for Xander's hand and pulls it up to his face to let Xander feel the tears on his cheek.

"I loved Dru for over a century," he says. "She was my dark goddess. And Angel." He stops. "He was my." He stops again.

"Yoda," Xander says.

"Yeah," Spike says. "My Yoda." He moves his cheek against Xander's hand. "They were my family," he says almost too soft for Xander to hear.

"We'll be your family now," Xander says, and his lips brush against Spike's shoulder. "I'll be your family." He holds Spike close and stays awake until Spike is asleep and his tears are dry.

He stumbles around the site the next morning, and even a couple of cups of strong construction site coffee doesn't make much difference.

"Heads up, Harris," Enrique says.

"Yeah," Xander mumbles. He takes another gulp of his coffee. "Late night."

"Oh yeah?" Enrique smirks at him.

Xander shakes his head. "Not like that. A friend of mine's having some family problems."

"Rough."

"I hear you, man." Xander dumps his latest coffee cup into the trash and does his best to concentrate on his job.

He's stumbling by the time he makes it down the stairs into the apartment. When he finds himself jerking awake in the shower for the third time, he decides it's time to get out before he does any real damage to himself.

Spike's still asleep, so he makes the effort to rummage through his clean clothes for boxers before he falls into bed. He sleeps all the way through to his alarm the next morning.

***

It's been a couple of weeks, two months maybe, without anyone hassling them, but it upset them both so much that calls from LA still make them a little tense. Even when the calls aren't for them.

Friday night Scooby meeting, and it's Angel. They can tell by the way Buffy's voice is on the phone. Then it's Giles talking to Angel, and then Giles talking to Wesley, and eventually he hangs up the phone.

Giles mutters to himself while he searches through the bookshelves and on into a couple of boxes of miscellaneous magical items. He ends up with two books and some kind of metal box in the middle of their research table.

Giles wipes his glasses with a handkerchief. "Angel has encountered a demon of some sort. Wesley has asked for the loan of some books and the Klowankh." He looks around at all of them. "Someone will have to take them to Los Angeles."

There's a moment where they all just look at each other, and then Spike surprises them all by saying, "I'll go."

"You don't have a car," Buffy points out.

"We'll take mine," Xander says, and look at that. He's just volunteered to visit Angel. And Cordelia.

They go home for a change of clothes--"Do you really think we'll be staying?" Xander asks, and Spike says, "Maybe, if we stay to help with killing things." And God, the devil, and any other eternal beings know that Spike's into the killing of things--and then they're on the road to LA.

They trade out tapes: Spike's punk, Xander's country, the Dingoes. It's not that long a drive, and Spike's a good navigator.

The Angel Investigations crew is surprised to see them, which means no one called them back to tell them who was bringing their magical items.

Xander and Cordy trade insults, but they don't hurt anymore. Angel doesn't seem to know quite what to do about them, and Spike pretends not to care. Wesley dithers about with the books and the Klowankh.

"So we're going demon hunting," Cordy finally sums up.

"Yes," Angel says. He looks at Spike. "Coming?"

Spike shoots a quick look at Xander before he stubs out his cigarette and says, "Yeah, sure. Can always use a good fight."

So they go out and fight some demons. Well, a demon anyway. They use a spell out of one of Giles' books and the Klowankh to do something Xander's not very clear about that makes it disappear.

"This is a lot easier with two extra people," Cordy says. "I didn't even ruin my shoes."

"Thank God for small blessings," Xander says.

"Some of us don't buy our shoes at Payless," she retorts.

"I'll have you know these came from Foot Locker."

"Were you two like this when you were dating?" Spike asks.

"Pretty much," Angel answers him.

They share a quick grin before they remember they're not friends.

"You can stay," Angel offers. "I have room."

"Thanks," Xander accepts for them both. "It's too late to make it back before sunrise."

They go back to Angel Investigations headquarters. Wesley and Cordelia head off to their own apartments, and Angel settles Spike and Xander into his living room. Xander gets the couch. Angel puts Spike on the floor. At least it's carpeted.

Sometime during the night, or day, or whatever the time is that they're sleeping, Spike insinuates himself into the space between Xander and the back of the couch.

"--crazy? What do you think you're doing?"

Xander's not sure if it's Spike's tension or Angel's harsh whispers that wake him up.

"Thought I was sleeping," Spike retorts, but quietly.

Xander sighs, opens his eyes, lets them know he's awake now.

"Do you mind?" he says to Angel. "I was trying to sleep."

Angel turns his glare on Xander. "Spike's sleeping with you," he grates.

"He gets cold." Xander yawns, grimaces, and slips out from under the blankets. "I'm grabbing a shower." He lets his fingers run through Spike's hair. "Don't kill each other."

They're sparring in Angel's workout space when Xander gets out of the shower, but there aren't any stakes in either of their hands, so he figures it's safe to go upstairs in search of human food.

"Xander!" Cordy greets him. "Did you leave Spike and Angel alone down there? Because I really don't think that's such a good idea."

"They're good. They're sparring, but I think they'll stop before anyone gets too dusty. Angel wasn't too happy about Spike sleeping with me, so they've got some issues to work out." Xander frowns. "That didn't come out right. Do you have anything to eat?" He heads for the bakery box on top of the mini-fridge.

"Yeah, there are donuts," Cordy automatically waves him toward the box. "What do you mean Spike was sleeping with you?"

"They were on the couch together," Angel says as he comes out of the elevator, and doesn't he just make it sound tawdry and wrong.

"I told you," Xander says, "he gets cold." He took in Wesley and Cordelia's shock. "He does! You know, vampire, no body heat."

"So get him an electric blanket if you're so worried about him! You don't have to let him sleep with you."

"We share a small apartment," Xander explains. "With one bedroom. And only one bed." He shrugs. "We're not even there at the same time that much."

"You don't have to share your bed," Cordy says, with way too much outrage for the situation.

"He pays his share of the rent," Xander points out. "I'm not going to make him sleep on the couch." He grabs up a donut--chocolate with sprinkles--and shoves half of it into his mouth. He came up here for breakfast, dammit, not to be grilled about his living situation.

Spike sees it and gives him a lazy grin. "Not nice to grill him before he's even had breakfast."

"Yeah, what he said," Xander says, or tries to say, what with the second half of his donut filling up his mouth.

"Xander," Cordy scolds. "That's disgusting!"

Xander swallows the last of his donut. "You won't stop talking! I just wanted breakfast."

Spike hands him a cup of coffee. Lots of cream, more sugar. Just the way he likes it. He gulps down half the cup of sugary, caffeiny goodness in one swallow. You have to eat fast in this place.

Spike dips a donut into Xander's coffee and bites into it. "That's the stuff. Better with some blood."

"Ewww." Cordy protests. "That's gross, Spike."

Xander takes the rest of the donut away from Spike. "You get used to it." He soaks the donut in his coffee and finishes it off. He gulps down the end of the coffee with its extra sugary goodness from the donut. "So what's the plan for the day?"

"The plan is not to share coffee and donuts with the evil undead," Cordy says.

"Okay," Xander says. "I get it. Can we move on now?"

Cordy glares at him. "Spike's the one who should move on."

Xander drops all pretense of good humor. "He's my roommate, Cordy. End of story."

"Well, fine," Cordy sniffs. "If you want to live with the evil undead who am I to complain?"

"Quite right," Spike sniffs back. "None of your business." He splits another donut with Xander. "What're we doing today?"

Cordelia tosses her hair with a well-practiced flounce. "I have an audition today." She smiles brightly at Angel. "I'll need some time off. I'll need to be there early, and of course I need some time to change and go over my monologue." She checks the clock. "In fact, I think I need to leave now." She gathers up her things. "I'll be back after the audition."

"Break a leg," Xander says. Spike snorts something about actresses and broken legs that Xander chooses not to hear.

"I believe we have some research to do," Wesley says. And that's the appropriate ex-watcher approach to life.

"Research we can do," Xander says.

"Don't volunteer me for any of that," Spike protests.

Xander nods at Cordy's empty chair. "Wesley might let you use Cordy's computer."

Spike brightens and eyes the computer speculatively. "You think? Red never lets me play with hers."

Wes looks worried. "I don't think--"

"Don't think about it," Xander advises. "He's only going to get in the way otherwise." He and Wesley, and Angel, after glaring suspiciously at Spike for a while, settle in with books and instructions. Different atmosphere here, from the library and from the Magic Box. Quieter.

At the computer, Spike chortles. "Come see this, Xander."

Xander doesn't even look up. "I'm not looking at more weird porn, Spike."

Spike grumbles but doesn't insist.

Wesley groans. "He's not really using Cordelia's computer to look at porn, is he?"

Xander looks up and shrugs. "Probably."

Wesley pales. "She's going to kill me."

"It won't be so bad," Xander comforts him. "We're all used to working with the dead."

They go back to work for a while, until Spike interrupts them again, this time with snickers.

"Spike," Angel growls.

Spike smirks at him. "Wanna see?"

"No," Angel says, and he's gritting his teeth, "I do not want to see."

"You sure?" Spike goads. "You're the one who was all hot on reconnecting and being a family." He waits a moment and then adds, "Even after Dru's little spell."

There's a long, still silence. Xander realizes that, for all their snarking and sparring, this is probably the first time either one of them has brought that up.

Angel slams his book shut, startling them all. "What would make you happy?" he asks Spike. "Would you be satisfied if I could get your chip out and lose my soul so we could all be one happy family again? Would you be happy if I got your chip out and left you and Dru to be together forever? What do you want?"

Spike stands and grabs his duster off the back of the chair. "Goin' down to your tunnels to grab a smoke." He's already digging out his lighter as he waits for the elevator doors to close.

Angel puts down his book and broods.

"You really upset him," Xander says, "when you were under Drusilla's spell." He watches Angel refocus on him. "You know how Spike is."

"Yes," Angel says, "I know how Spike is."

That seems to be all Angel's going to say. He opens his book and returns to reading. Xander waits a while before he goes downstairs to find Spike.

"Dunno this was such a good idea," Spike says. "Shoulda sent someone else."

"As soon as it gets dark," Xander promises, "we'll leave."

They skulk about in the sewers while Spike chain-smokes his way through the rest of the pack. Only when he tosses the empty pack away in disgust do they go back upstairs.

Things are quiet until Cordy gets back, and then her tales of auditioning steamroll over anything anyone else might have to say.

"Sun's down," Spike finally says, interrupting a diatribe on the competition's dye job. "We're off."

Cordy's caught, surprised at the interruption, with her mouth open.

"Already?" Wesley cuts in before she can recover.

Spike taps impatiently on his duster. "Gonna try to pick up an extra shift at Willy's."

Xander sends Spike down the stairs to gather their things--"Do I look like a bloody bellboy?" "You're always telling me you're stronger than I am."--and says his goodbyes.

"Spike," Angel tries when he gets back with their bags.

Spike refuses to let go of the bags. "Right," he says. He nods sharply, a gesture that includes Angel.

Xander shrugs at them. Angel gives him a resigned yet understanding look. Cordy hugs him and Wesley shakes his hand.

Despite making Spike carry the bags, Xander helps put them into the trunk.

Spike holds out his hand. "Come on then," he says. "Gimme the keys."

Xander holds them away from Spike. "Uh-uh. No way, blondie. I love you, but there's no way you're driving my car." Wait, rewind, did he just--

Spike kisses him.

It's soft, just lips against lips, each of them still leaning one hand on the trunk for balance. And there go those boundaries.

It goes on for a long time, until Xander has to laugh.

"We're kissing in front of Angel's," he explains. "I thought I was done with this the last time I had a date in high school."

Spike gives him an amused smile. Xander takes advantage of it and gets into the car--on the driver's side--while Spike's distracted.

***

"C'mere," Spike says when Xander goes into the bedroom after his post-work shower.

Xander crawls his way up the bed, and he hopes to God this is what Spike means.

Spike meets his kiss with a hard kiss of his own.

Now that he's here, it's like every fantasy he never knew he had is coming true. Spike's lips against his, Spike's body against his, Spike's cock against--

Xander realizes that Spike's naked under the sheet.

He works his way down Spike's body, kissing and nipping and licking, tasting and learning Spike. When his towel bunches and gets in the way, he pulls it off and drops it on the floor. He does the same thing with the sheet keeping him from the rest of Spike.

It's almost embarrassing how much he wants to suck Spike's cock.

He touches it first, brushing it with the tips of his fingers.

Spike bucks up into it. "Yeah, that's it."

Xander lowers his mouth down over him. Spike groans and cups his hands around the back of Xander's head. Xander doesn't really know why he bothers--it's not like he's about to go anywhere--but Spike's hands are nice, and it doesn't distract too much from the cock in his mouth.

Spike's voice does distract him, but he pushes his hand against Spike's mouth and then he sucks on Xander's fingers instead of talking.

When he comes, Spike gives up on Xander's fingers and lets out a tomcat yowl.

Xander swallows deep and follows it up with some licking of Spike's softening cock. He lets go of Spike's cock and shimmies up his body. He's not an expert shimmier, but he figures Spike's blissed out enough for it not to matter.

Spike meets him partway and hauls him the rest of the way up for a hard kiss.

Xander comes out of it grinning and guides Spike's hand down to his cock.

Spike squeezes tightly and then strokes roughly. And then Spike flips him over, does a truly expert shimmy all the way down his body, and goes down on him.

Spike doesn't have to breathe. This is the best blowjob ever. It's too bad it doesn't last long enough for Xander to properly appreciate it. When he's done coming, Xander yanks Spike up to taste himself on Spike's lips.

Spike lets himself be kissed and then breaks away to flop down on the bed next to Xander.

Xander leans over Spike and kisses him before he bounces out of bed. "Who's hungry?" It's a mostly rhetorical question Xander asks as he yanks on his jeans.

Spike just stares at him. "Where'd you get all the energy, pet?"

Xander leans halfway over the bed and kisses Spike again. "I usually only have sex this good before an apocalypse."

He leaves Spike laughing and goes out to the kitchen. He sorts through the fridge, pulling out a little of this, a little of that. He chops things and dumps it all into a pan to saute. Despite what other people may think, he can cook. Nothing fancy, but he does manage to keep himself fed.

He's bouncing a little on his toes in front of the stove when Spike makes it out of bed. Spike wraps his arms around Xander. It's nice. Hot. Xander hasn't bothered to put on a shirt, and when he turns in Spike's arms, he finds that Spike hasn't bothered to put on anything at all.

They kiss. It's long and deep, and Spike plasters himself against Xander's body. Xander ends it with a nip of Spike's lip and turns back to his dinner. Spike kisses his neck, his shoulder, his bicep.

"You going all Pepe Le Pew on me?" Xander asks with a laugh. He leans over and presses a quick kiss on Spike's lips.

Spike attempts a sneer but it comes out as amusement. Xander grins back at him, and they attend to preparing their own dinners.

They sit across the table from each other, and it's like so many other pre-Scooby meeting dinners, except it's a little earlier than usual and Spike's naked. And when they're done, Xander can leave his plate on the table, push Spike's chair back, and settle himself down onto Spike's lap. Because, hey, naked means sex and vampire means strong and no need to breathe.

The thought of what Spike can do with his lack of need to breathe makes Xander kiss him a little harder than he might have otherwise. With anyone else Xander'd ever kissed, it would have gotten him slapped, or at least ended the moment. With Spike, it gets him held close and tight and kissed back.

When Spike grabs his ass, Xander returns the thought by biting down on Spike's shoulder. When Spike undoes his jeans and pulls out Xander's cock, Xander scrapes his fingernails over Spike's nipples. He'd thought Spike might like it a little rough, and the way Spike grinds up against his jeans-clad ass seems to prove it.

Spike draws Xander down for a deep kiss and strokes just his fingertips up Xander's cock. Xander bucks into it, seeking more, which not so coincidentally rubs his ass over Spike's cock. Spike does it a couple of more times, until Xander swears at him.

"Bastard."

Spike kisses him and starts to stroke him properly. Xander has to break away from the kiss to breathe, and to groan. Spike strokes and thrusts and mouths at Xander's neck. Xander rides Spike's body and kisses random bits of Spike's skin.

Xander wants it as much this time as he did the last, but this time it seems slow. He knows--he can see the clock from Spike's lap--that it hasn't been very long. He knows this is fast, but he has time to bend his head down and nuzzle against Spike's face. He has time to appreciate every stroke of Spike's skin against his. He has time to feel the hard press of Spike's cock against his ass. All before he comes. All before Spike comes.

He kisses Spike deeply afterwards. He climbs off of Spike's lap and dumps his plate and Spike's mug into the sink.

"I'm going to grab a quick shower." Xander raises his eyebrows at Spike. "Want to join me?"

Spike groans from his limp sprawl. "If you wanted to kill me, you could have just used a stake."

Xander laughs and stops to kiss him on his way to the bathroom.


End file.
